Ginger Moon: The Journal of Life

不在乎拥有多少物质财富，塑造外表和精神都美好的自己。很多现在看来重要的事，
三五年后都化作云烟。只有自己的形体，思维， 气质，心灵是不断发展无法摆脱
的。

这个季节火鸡风行。我生在感恩节左右， 生日有时跟火鸡日重叠。火鸡日因此也多
了一层意义， 是我感谢生活给予的日子。周六的天那样蓝， 阳光一射无余。去 Ikea
买了红色的窗帘，挂在卧室的落地窗上。整个屋子一下显得喜气样样， 也冲淡了冬
天的清寒。晚上睡觉时打开了百页帘， 夜色和月光从恋逢里透进来， 象个波澜不
惊的梦。 生活是这样沸腾， 这样美丽。快三十的我仍然常常这样感叹。生活中的
惊讶和欢乐使我年少时的梦境不断重现。

跟你同度一生的只有你自己！我忽然明白了这句话的含义。这一年我依旧年轻， 但
成熟， 自信，快乐，带着些沧桑的美丽。象校园民遥里的一首歌，“在那遥远的春
色里我遇到了盛开的她， 洋溢着灿烂的光华象一个美丽童话。” 在自己的轨道上
忙碌行走，又不忘采摘路旁的玫瑰。在世界这块土地上自由行走，遇到一些传奇的
人与传奇的事。

追求生活的美丽， 诗情， 与优雅----新一年的左右铭。不在乎吃什么也不在乎穿
什么，只让那年青生命的自然美四处飘扬。不受外界人事的干扰， 就这样自自然然
地作我自己。

“人，诗意地栖居在大地上”---海德格儿。

I have been writing a novel titled, "we were born in the 70s." Oh, yes, so much to write about. Here are some excerpts in Chinese for my Chinese readers:

我们出生在七十年代: 杜鹃花开四处

有一种人, 现实再严酷, 灵魂却总是在单纯的梦中. 故事中的人物毛咪和出生在七
十年代的那一批人，就这样在痛苦中快乐地燃烧着生命, 烧成一片火红的的杜鹃花
. 于是年年月月杜鹃花开四处.
--题记

　　　　　　　　　　　　
不知道什么时候她们微笑着走出童年， 含着泪向童年说一声再见。
故乡的歌
是一只清远的笛
总是在有月亮的晚上
响起故乡的面貌
却是一种模糊的愁怅
仿佛雾里的挥手别离
离别后乡愁是一颗没有年轮的树
永不老去
--席幕容

人说初恋是清纯的荷花，热恋是燃烧的木棉，成熟的恋情则是凤凰花。

What does love have to do with your personal and professional development? A lot. When we are emotionally involved, work becomes interesting, stimulating, and eventually successful. My passion is to write--articles, blogs, novels, poetry. or letters to friends. Writing to find out what you are thinking--a bright student of mine said so. Life is certainly not dull when you have so much to write every day. And fortunately, I can afford to do so as an academia. Yes, kudos to academic lifestyle.

I went to Mizu, a Japanese restaurant at Mission Beach last night. It felt so good to get out. Their deluxe combo is my favorite, 6 pcs spicy tuna roll, with Salmon, house ginger salad, soup, and rice. A group of teens were celebrating birthday and they made lots of noises. I watched and thought, "this is how life should be." Always happy, always cheerful, always carefree, always own the world.
The tide was very low last night and the sky is covered by fog, can't see the moon and the stars. Airplanes took off and shot towards the sky, like brave and fearless birds. I kept wondering where each of them is going. I have some type of attachment to airplanes, because they take me from China to the U.S., to Dublin, to every corner I like to go. Airplanes also bring me back to the loneliness in my childhood, in that deep mountain of rural China. They remind me that there is a big world out there and you need to explore and experience!

I always have vivid dreams. This dream came about 5 or 6am this morning. The elevator of a high rise building did not work so we (with a friend Maria and another anonymous girl) had to climb to the 23th floor. Then we saw the night sky, the shining stars, and the Christmas carriage flying across the sky. I was very sad the entire time because in the dream a loved one vanished. The good news is that Chinese dream interpretation sees this as a positive sign, here is a URL if you can read Chinese, Dream-interpretation. However, don't cry in bed because that will be a bad omen. Who knows what is what!
But here are some examples:
1. Dreaming is better than not dreaming
2. Dream of shooting stars: your house is in danger (yes, San Diego fire)
3. Nightmare usually has good meanings.
I am happy now. Next time, check your dreams.

The fire is now only burning in the East mountains and life is getting back to Normal. The air seems fresher today and finally I can see the smiling sun. School remained closed today. So I have been closed in at home in the past three days.
So sad to see people who have lost their homes, the hard core of an American dream. But also, we learned that material is only external and inner strength can help us get through difficult times.

Fire has burned down 615 homes! The first disastrous day after 911. 5000 people are being sheltered at QualComm stadium; freeways are closed. San Diego has become a ghost town, burning but bleak. Friends called; students emailed; colleagues offered housing. These all meant a lot to me.

The scenes on TV look like Gone with Wind. I am exhausted from car-loading and I felt like crying. My car is full of diaries, photo albums, important papers, clothing, and my favorite novel. A colleague said, “We’re watching the fire from our kitchen window. We’re not packed to go but on reflection there’s not much that we couldn’t live without.�

Doors and windows have been closed all day; I am near suffocation. Loneliness surrounds me like smoke. This is one of the very few times that I wish having a husband. [Smile]. I also miss loved ones terribly. When our lives are in danger, we realize the most important things in life. We learn not to take anything for granted. I need a tight hug to know that life is still good. I will be dreaming of it tonight if I can still sleep in my own bed.

I am getting ready for evacuation. Fire is getting closer to 8 Freeway. Hope everything will be fine. Can you imagine things happen over night like this?

Fire is spreading in Southern California. The sky is covered by smoke and looks sand-yellow, like the end of the world. I am a little scared. Several freeways have been closed and people are being evacuated. A student emailed me to get project extension, "we are getting ready to leave our house any time." A peaceful and stable living environment is precious, indeed. How often do we take it for granted! How often do we take health, sufficiency, friendship, and love for granted!

I had to use this as his name. He is from an Asian country and reminded me of the boys I grew up with. First class he said he wanted to be a lord, which made the class laugh. When we were making iMovie, he had this funny footage, "Bush said to me--you must do what you must do." He is one of the most bright, attentive and lively students I have ever had. He is also such as a free spirit. When he enjoyed working with computers, he sang in the middle of the class to himself. Finally I had to make a sign "no singing" and waved at him from time to time. He smiled, "that means you care."
The other night he brought me a bottle of soft drink. I thanked him afterwards and he said, "Don't worry about the drink, if it was up to me, you would get a drink delivered everyday to your front lawn." People like this made teaching fun and rewarding. I am glad I am experiencing this.

Listening to others and get inspired. A nice lady from Colorado said to me, "work is not everything. There are so many important things in our lives." Most people know it but do not act on it. Work has invaded our personal lives like flood. If work doesn't go well, then we feel crushed, as if the world has collapsed.
I promised her that I'll write this down and revisit it from time to time. I hope you find it inspiring too. It's important to step back and look at the big picture of life and find a balance.

Solitude! That's what I desire for in the morning. Just sitting at my home office, write, think and surf online.
I spent two wonderful days at a conference in Anaheim, the Disneyland. I went out with some friends from Utah and we danced to an open-air band, Salsa and merengue. It was such a beautiful band. The rest of the time I talked to people and made some new contact. I felt sad when I had to leave the evening party, which showcased the Manhattan band and the Swing Dolls. But there is always next time. It feels good to venture out of our little world and get connected to the larger world. And I miss the special people I met there.

A beautiful Ocean Sunset.. I usually get tired of my photos quickly, but this one stays one of my favorites.

I worked intensively today. The weather was hot like summer and I recalled this wonderful summer of 2003. When dusk came, I took a brisk walk around Lake Murray. The cool breeze caressed my hair, styled like Mega Ryan in You got Mail.

Airplanes flew across the evening sky, and the stars sparkled all over. All of a sudden I was overwhelmed by the memories of this summer, that warm cozy July night in D.C., that club night in Santa Barbara, and those unforgettable nights in the red woods. I keep telling myself that this is my best year, a year of travel, adventure, dream, reality, passion and maturity.

D.C. was quite fun. I spent four nights in a secluded fourth-floor room at a conference center. The hotel is located right in the forest of Benesda and used to be a convent. When the night came, the room would be in complete darkness. It took me right back to nature! I must have slept like a baby, accompanied by the singing trees, just like those summer nights in that Chinese village. I also met a beautiful singer Kristy. We walked everywhere in the Mall area, from G street to the White House. Another night we were soaked by the pouring rain, on the way to a Salsa club near George Town. Surprisingly, we both found dedicated dance partners and had a wonderful time.

Santa Barbara was quite an experience too. The campus dorm was right by the ocean. There I met a Spanish girl Nieves, a party queen. She drove me every night to downtown for bar hop,dancing and drinking whisky. It happened to be the fiesta week and State street was filled with happiness. You can get drunk by breathing the air. We then had that fiesta night at the downtown historical society. There were two bands and we danced under the evening stars. I was so immersed that I did not stop for a moment. Several people came to me and said, "You are quite a dancer!"

But none of the above can compare with the red woods; that isolated cabin in the deep red woods. I was the only human being within 5 miles. It felt like the most isolated corner on earth; no phone, no radio, but ironically, there was high-speed Internet. I was separated from the crowds but connected to the world. I asked a friend to tell the patrol to keep an eye on me. He called and said, "The officer looked quite confused. He said this is such a safe place." I laughed and put Pepper Spray underneath my pillow and listened to Beijing Music radio all night long. It was at those moments I really got in touch my soul, my spirit, and myself. I felt stronger and peaceful afterwards. When the busy fall comes, I often retreat to that little cabin and feel the flow of life.
I have to stop here now and come back to the real world. Lots of work to finish this week. Gosh, life is busy, but never too busy to write. Writing is good for our souls, a friend said so. And he is right.

Every day when I am working, my mind often slips into many of the memorable moments I had in the past. They put me into a more emotional and sentimental mode and thus I work more productively. Interesting, isn't it! I wonder if this has something to do with growing up in a high-context culture.

This morning I keep thinking of the Candye Kane concert in a beatiful town near San Francisco. I was feeling down that night, because of the end of a short vacation. And there she came, a big but charming, self-content, and courageous lady. Reviewers say, she is "as colorful as a peacock in a paint plant." She is sweet and down to earth. She can just be herself. Nothing in the world seems to bother her. And she sang several songs to celebrate passion and love and passionate love. That was the spirit I was looking for.

Fans gathered around the stage, dancing to her "for your love." At one point, she looked at me and showed me how to dance, especially some hip movement. I laughed, "sorry I have no hips." Chinese culture (the time when I was growing up) discourages women from showing their physical beauty and from creative expression in public. I used to be quiet and sweet but life in America has changed me. Now I often long for creative expression and sincere appreciation. Kane made that a special evening, which I think of often. No offense, but it feels so good to break out of the shell of an academia! Link to Kane: http://thinks.com/cgi-bin/music/music.pl/item-B000009OTB/search-AsinSearch/cds.htm

Words of the Day--stop comparing our lives with others; and stop asking why. We can always find excuses to feel sorry for ourselves. Enjoy what you have and make the best out of it. --Joel Osteen at Midnight show.

I went for Salsa last night at La Jolla. It was fun. But my real passion is till Argentina Tango, which often feels like a dream of two minutes. [Hope some tango fans are reading this.] However, Tango is too sentimental and has to be reserved for special moments, either when I am really happy or really sad. I am too busy to have emotions these days [sigh.] Anyway I decided to balance my life/work and have some life. It seems that we can never finish work but life is too fun not to live.

Also, my mind can’t help slipping back to many of the special dancing moments I had with my dance partner who shares my dancing passion. In the past few months, we danced everywhere we met, starting from an island, to street musicians in several cities, and to fine restaurants like café Sevilla. People in Southern California rarely dance on the street, but we did, at a corner of Fifth and market. It was a corner that cut out for us, nice lighting, no crowds. People walked by and stared at us; some smiled with an encouragement. But we did not care what they think or feel. We were too busy living our lives. I often think of that corner and want to claim it ours. Growing up in a small and isolated village along the Yellow River of China, I felt like having lived multiple lives. Who can ever imagine that one day I will live in America’s finest city and dance Salsa. Therefore, I am often content with life and very appreciative of being alive and lively.

Welcome to Gingermoon! The name is a bit weired but there is some history. Ginger spices up some of the best food (ice cream, fish, and carrot soup) and moon is what my Chinese name means. I'll try to keep up keep up. Thank you for visiting!